struggling with contemporary novels

Perhaps it's the spring... that dawning of a new phase of life, or both, but I have been quitting on novels with reckless abandon lately.

While that feels freeing, it also feels like a great waste of time. 

I enjoy watching bookish content, and following book prizes (even if I don't read most of the long/short listed novels). I know that this consumption of others' opinions can make one grow more distant from their own internal taste.

always a good time for austen

I love deeply moving character narratives. I believe that it has been a long time since authors were collectively capable of writing deeply moving character portrayals AND exciting plots (see Thomas Hardy, James Baldwin, Zora Neale Hurston).

Now, it's either navel-gazey meanderings which give zero insight into the human experience, or they are formulaic wastes of time that leave me rolling my eyes, guessing every next plot point, and feeling manipulated by it all.

This not me saying one single bad thing about authors or those who love traditionally published genre fiction. I also find myself enjoying some of these novels, but not often enough. I believe the issue is that I keep watching people enjoy these books, and someone I think that if I keep trying them, I'll enjoy them. That hasn't been the case.

As I've gone back to school, I have had to make other trade offs when it comes to extraneous reading. This makes me interested ONLY in deeply moving 5 star reads. Even when I thought I would read a light romance novel, I dnfed it within 55 pages. 

It's okay... I'm organizing my "free" reads in the meantime to keep up with making time to read well. 

I am off to create my literary plate, and organize my kindle into collection so that when I am ready to read a few pages from each book, they can all be in the same place.

Great literature wins again.

snippets from letters to vera (mr. nabokov)

 Oh Mr. Nabokov.... 

Lolita was one of my favorite reads from 2023 and is on a permanent and constant re-read list for me. This is high high praise for any novel imho.

This collection of letters from Vladimir to his wife are beautiful, obsessive, inspirational and most importantly feel like praying into an intimate love. 

I'll be just typing out a few bits of letters. If you want exact locations, please feel free to look them up in the Modern Classics edition from Penguin.

modern classics cover

"I dreamt of you last night-as if I was playing the piano and you were turning the pages for me." VN to VéN, 12 January 1924

"How I wish you were saying, right now, with feeling: 'But you promised me!?...' I love you, my sun, my life, I love your eyes- closed- all the little tails of your thoughts, your stretchy vowels, your whole soul from head to heels."

"Do you know that you are my happiness? You are made entirely of tiny arrow-like movements- I love every one of them."

This will be a slow read for me. Taking my time. I will dip in and out of these letters as my mood moves me.

Happy epistolatory reading to you as well.

re-reading the days away

Nothing can make me feel excited about "romance" or "gossipy" reads like Thomas Hardy. 

Every time I want a lighter or just dysfunctional read, I reach for Thomas Hardy. I've been rereading Far From the Madding Crowd for the countless time.

I found myself DNFing book after book, and whenever that is the case, I have to pay attention to exactly what I am picking up.

I've toyed with ideas of returning to BookTube with a standard channel, and have revisited the reasons I left. They all hold up as true. I have decided to return (more later), but in a MUCH different way. 

As spring break approaches, I have a plethora of books on my currently reading schedule and I don't care about dates finished/ page counts, or any other such thing. It's all about reading books that transform and change me. Books that can be companions with cups of coffee

one of my favorites of all time

I find that the more heavy-hitting, great literature I read, the harder it is to return to lighter, contemporary works. 

It's a cold + sunny Sunday, and I am off for a slow treadmill walk while reading and planning what books will accompany me along my relaxing week's journey.