books to end 2024 on a peaceful and introspective note

Messy side table showcasing how busy and pushed for time I am as the year comes to a close. Frosty mornings with hot coffee find me sitting by candlelight and reflecting on all that has happened this year. 

my messy side table today

I still have 5000 words to write before the 24th as an academic draft, but aside from that I am wanting to prepare for some intense medical test, and deep rest. Lots of reading by candlelight with book lights, reading on kindle warm feature activated, and copious amounts of tea.

I've been deeply reflective, intensely focused on how desperate I am for 2025 to be starkly different and more directed than 2024. 

Reading is a safe place for me and increases my wellbeing 100 fold, and I have some pretty cozy plans and intentions for my reading life in 2025.

love this edition

tab city: so many wise gems in this novel

I am loving Mrs. Dalloway and cannot believe it has taken me this long to read it. Absolutely in love with how situated in time and place the novel is. Virginia Woolf is a gorgeous prose stylist, and this novel is already on my "will re-read forever" list. 

Reading this novel slowly and deeply late at night when I have some free time has been so beautiful. I definitely have other books scaffolded around this novel, but in the chance that I finish it before december 31st, I have plans to re-read Jane Eyre.

this will be my first read of this edition

I thought I would make it out of 2024 without re-reading Jane Eyre, but the dark moors are calling me, so I have to answer the call of the Brontës and sink down into this fantastic tale of sadness, quiet despair, strong character, love, and redemption.

Jane Eyre remains one of my top 3 favorite novels of all time, and normally I don't pass a late Autumn or Winter season without reading most or all of this novel.

I'm sending warmth and love your way and hoping that if (like me) life has battered you on the shores of 2024, that you take some time for deep reflection as the winter solstice nears and remember that there is a soft space to land inside of the best works of literature.

Happy reading and be well ☕️ 

poetry pause: XX:: mina loy

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XX

Let Joy go solace-winged

To flutter whom she may concern

Mina Loy

ambience rooms for reading

At this time of year I like to just sit, no other noise with the ambience room volume down to zero and read for an uninterrupted amount of time.

Life is pressing on me from all sides, and these moments of sinking into stories for a set amount of time help me so much.

So, if you're someone who doesn't always have the aesthetic perfection seen online at this time of the year, or the time or bandwidth to navigate this season with hours on end to read... turn on a beautiful ambience room online and set a short time and settle into a good story.

I honestly treat it like a meditation. 

poetry pause: VIII:: mina loy

 

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VIII

I am the jealous store-house of the candle-ends

That lit your adolescent learning

___________________________________

Behind God's eyes

There might

Be other lights

Mina Loy

books i'm reading this weekend in between grad work (not a literature student) and carer responsibility

I have not gained ground under my feet. This idea that "one day" I am going to have a zillion hours to relax and just read by candlelight.

Instead of waiting for the ideal life circumstances in which to read, I have made a few changes to how I have been approaching my reading.

november 2024

Changes I've made in my reading life this semester:

1. Lessening time I am spending watching BookTube. Rather than feeling like I'm inspired to read more, I just feel totally overwhelmed.
2. Not tracking my reading on Goodreads or online
3. Not worrying about finishing what I am reading on any kind of timetable
4. Mixing audio (rare and mainly re-reads), with physical books, and ebooks both on my tablets (ipad and kindle fire), and my paperwhite

amazing reads

The consequences of these changes

As a consequence of changing this, my focus is just on, "What am I reading?"... not, "What have I finished?" It's such a lovely thought, that I just don't even worry about how long it's taking me to get through certain books or re-reads, I am just enjoying it.

Right now I have a book on kindle for late at night to totally decompress. It's a women's fiction type of free novel on Prime; a few classics, some literary fiction, etc.  I will post about all of them this weekend. 

I deleted Goodreads after like 11 years because I seem to struggle with overwhelm when it comes to social media-esque things and I had so many friends on there all commenting on each book I read, and I couldn't manage it well. I transitioned over to Storygraph which was great, but my kindle didn't integrate with it, so it so it felt like yet another thing to do. 

I want to start a physical book journal like I used to keep, but honestly unless it can seamlessly flow with what I am already doing, I won't bother with it. I have to keep everything simple right now, or the overwhelm will choke me. 

Upcoming weekend reading theme

I am going to focus on prioritizing school work (a bit behind), and doing what I'm doing which is reading in bits when I have time in between all of this immense reading and writing. 

reading shirley by charlotte brontë and a few quotes

 

I love this cover 

This is the second time I'm reading Shirley by Charlotte Brontë. I have really been taking my time with this re-read. Not only is the moralizing a bit annoying during this re-read, it hits differently considering what's happening in the state of America and the world right now.

As a result, I am definitely going to finish it, and I am about 85% done. After this re-read I am going to hold off on reading the Brontës for a bit. I thought I was going to read Jane Eyre before the year ends, but I'll wait on that thought.

Here a few quotes from the novel to give you a bit of the gist of the vibe of the novel.

“I am anchored on a resolve you cannot shake. My heart, my conscience shall dispose of my hand -- they only. Know this at last.”

“Strange that grief should now almost choke me, because another human being's eye has failed to greet mine.”

“You had no right to be born; for you make no use of life. Instead of living for, in, and with yourself, as a reasonable being ought, you seek only to fasten your feebleness on some other person's strength.”

 “I'll borrow of imagination what reality will not give me.”

“A lover masculine so disappointed can speak and urge explanation, a lover feminine can say nothing; if she did, the result would be shame and anguish, inward remorse for self-treachery. Nature would brand such demonstration as a rebellion against her instincts, and would vindictively repay it afterwards by the thunderbolt of self-contempt smiting suddenly in secret.”

“Once I only saw her beauty, now I feel it.” 

I will continue on with Shirley and the other several novels that I am sandwiching between my carer responsibilities and my immense school work.  

poetry pause: happy the man:: john dryden (1631-1700)

 

source: stock photo

Happy the Man

Happy the man, and happy he alone,

He who can call today his own;

He who, secure within, can say, 

Tomorrow, do they worst, for I have

lived today.

John Dryden

poetry pause: sometimes:: mary oliver's devotions (in part)

source: stock photo

Sometimes (one stanza)

2.

Sometimes

melancholy leaves me breathless

Mary Oliver

i will read for peace of mind, oh america, you constant disappointment

After Pennsylvania flipped, I turned the tv off and haven't turned it on since then. 

Oh America, you constant disappointment. From the shores of Africa to the bayous of Louisiana, to the promised North- I've seen every facet of hate this country has to show. It showed it's true red, white, and blue this past Tuesday.

Reading has always been a solace. A safe place to grapple with the ancient meaning of existence and a shared consciousness with humanity. 

I'll use it to help heal my frustrated heart.

shine on

I wrote more and then I deleted it. I'm not sure who reads this and I won't pour my heart out here for entertainment. I don't really receive comments so this site is more of a book diary for me than a community of readers, so it doesn't make since to showcase my vulnerabiilty.

However, if like me you need some peace... you can find it in the great works of literature. 

It's fine. It's okay. Time is ticking.... 

poetry pause: now may every living thing:: anon.

 

source: stock photo

Now May Every Living Thing

Now may every living thing, young 

or old,

weak or strong, living near or far,

known or

unknown, living or departed or yet

unborn,

may every living thing be full of

bliss.

Anon.